Wednesday, January 30, 2008

The cluster fuck that is the Clinton campaign

Ya, so I was sitting around my house yesterday, and I get a call from this guy that asks me if I would be interested in attending a speech by former president Bill Clinton. It sounded pretty interesting, and the speech was to take place not far from my home, so I figured what the hell. Now, the temperature outside was tundra to say the very least, but I said to myself, "Self, how many times are you going to get the chance to hear a U.S. President speak?" So, I got out of bed around 6am this morning, and dragged my ass to the site of the speech, only to find a line that contained at least 500 people already, and I was an hour and a half early. I'm standing in 11 degree air, waiting in line an hour to hear him speak.

The doors finally open, and by now, the line has 1000 or so people in it. This is when we are informed that the venue holds 300, that's right 300 people. Now, this is stupid enough, especially considering their is a gym nearby (maybe 100 yards or so) that holds at least 3000 people, and would have accomodated any and all that wanted to attend. That clearly would have been to simple and convenient. Wait it gets better.

I am actually close enough to the entrance in the line to make it inside the building. I'm clearly excited that my lack of sleep has paid off, and I'm actually going to be rewarded for my suffering, and for my face which is now blue due to the lack of heat. I walk past the police at the entrance, that give a half hearted glance at my open coat and wave me through, and walk down the hall to a projection TV showing what is going on inside the theatre where the former president is to speak. I am further informed by a security guard prick, that no one else would be allowed inside the hall where Clinton is to speak, but I could watch it on TV. I could've stayed home you stupid cop prick!!! So, I say to myself, "Well, this sucks! Sure am glad I got out of bed 3 hours early on my day off, drove 15 miles to get here, waited in sub-arctic winds for the better part of an hour, to stand in this hallway, and watch a speech on a projection tv screen that I could have stayed home and watched in my bed, thanks assholes." I threw the doors open, put the stupid Hillary for Prez sign that they had given me for my trouble where it belonged, in the garbage, and walked back to my car.

Now, I have only a couple of things to say to the Clinton's about this debacle. First, don't bother calling me at home and inviting me to another speech if this is how you are going to organize the damn event. Second, and more importantly, if I were at any point considering voting for Hillary Clinton, that time has assuredly now passed. Unbelievable, is all I can say about the entire cluster fuck of an event. It took me 2 hours under an electric blanket to thaw enough to get back to sleep. If there is a god of justice, one day Hillary Clinton will be standing across the pharmacy counter, and I will make her ass stand outside in the freezing ass, cold weather and wait for me to fill her presciption.

To hell with the Clinton's, never again.